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He’s a recent widower (wife died of cancer in June 2010.) We started dating just after Labor Day. We live about an hour and 1/2 apart and he has a very high level job and a big house to take care of (and a dog.) There has been no sex yet but lots of “foreplay.” He says he always waits to have sex until he’s more sure of the woman.I want to see more of him at this point (3 months,) especially on Saturday nights.

Within a few dates, the question about past relationships inevitably comes up, and I never know how to answer this.

I want to be honest, but as someone in my 30s with little relationship history, I […] Read more Someone telling you that he or she is looking for a relationship isn’t the same thing as really and truly wanting one.

But this is the norm for widowers –for one of two reasons: either the marriage itself wasn’t that healthy and he was immediately ready to move on, OR, like men of a certain age, he put everything had into his marriage and nothing into any other relationships. As such, you are presumably the first woman he’s been with for many years.

So when a woman survives her husband, she’s got a circle of friends from the neighborhood, from work, from her card game, from her book club, from her salsa classes. Regardless, he dictates the terms of the relationship based on HIS needs and schedule. To his credit, he’s taking things slow, to avoid diving into another serious relationship that he may end up regretting.

I get it—it seems like an impossibility that you will meet the right person, someone […] Read more It all started when an eharmony engineer named Greg Petroski thought to himself, wouldn’t it be cool if there was an eharmony skill for Amazon Alexa, where you could check out your matches, listen to messages, and get updated without lifting a finger?