Some would rather have cancer than live with the stigma of the infection, where a diagnosis is filled with not only internalized gay shame but a sense of fault: Nationally, 20 percent of gay and bisexual men are estimated to be living with HIV.
We need to let our HIV-positive friends know we are available to discuss status and safe sex openly.
Rather than spending time writing things like "neg for neg" in an online profile, we need to clue people in that we are ready to have a more informed discussion around risk and transmission.
We need to inform ourselves about the risks of HIV in 2012 and understand what it means to have the infection today.
And we need to understand, and incorporate into our sex lives, the fact that a risk of transmission is higher with someone who doesn't know his status and/or is not on medication than with someone who is being treated.
This is difficult for me to write and maybe for you to read. The next worst will be the day we bury you from AIDS." Much has changed since then.