It can be confusing if your children have both parents under one roof for a week, then another breakup, then back together.
If you commit to being with your spouse again, really commit and make the changes necessary, in yourselves and in your relationship, to keep the relationship going.
Date other people if you want, and make the personal changes you both need to make in order to be better partners in the future. It's easy to slide right back into old habits, but remember that the relationship you two had before didn't work, so trying again with a fresh approach can be helpful.
Don't go right back to eating dinner in front of the TV. Go on dates with your ex the way you did when your relationship was new: out to dinner, the movies, long walks ... And there's no need to see each other every day -- slow down and enjoy the dating period.
Is it ever appropriate to get back together with an ex-spouse? “I can see all different kinds of circumstances why you might end up dating someone you’ve broken up with,” says Jessica Bollinger, a therapist in Lexington, Kentucky. If we want to try this, we can’t just have these little rendezvous.’ I guess I’d have to ask myself this. Why am I allowing myself to remain emotionally stuck, instead allowing myself to stay here?
“I think what you can bring into dating your next spouse is a new beginning, taking in and bringing in new learning that you have about relationships, because we’re different people every day, and we’re changing and growing every day. ” “If they’ve done it all, they need to say, ‘This won’t work. ” “A couple gets a divorce and has their reasons for doing that, and after the divorce can decide for any number of reasons that they want to get back together again,” says Kevin Rhinehart, a social worker and marriage therapist in Boise, Idaho.
Once you have dated for a time and are ready to move forward, make a commitment.